Important Themes of Life

I just read two books back to back and they were astoundingly similar. I am not suggesting plagiarism here. I’m thinking about the concept of universal literary topics instead. The ones explored in both books are infertility, male/female relationships, mother/daughter struggles, and father/daughter love (with dads who are sick). Two new books discussing these same topics tell me they are topics worth exploring. Let’s do so now with one bonus element I’ll mention in a minute.

But first, let me say a bit about the two books. The first is Once and Again by Rebecca Serle published March 10, 2026. The second is More Than Enough by Anna Quindlen, published February 24, 2026. In both cases, these are authors I truly enjoy. I am always on the lookout for new books from them. But I must say it scrambles my brain that the books are so similar.

Of course, there are differences in the books. Most notably, Rebecca Serle writes Magical Realism so there is always some magic in her novels. In this one, the women of the family receive a ticket at birth that allows them one do-over in life. They can turn back the hands of time to erase some part of their history that is troubling.

In Anna Quindlen’s book, there are additional meaty topics – the unsettling results of a DNA test, the illness of a dear friend, and the closeness of a sister/brother relationship.

As I explore the common elements of these books, I would also like to mention an article I read in Psychology Today. It cites the work of Dr. Maja Djikic, who is a personality psychologist specializing in adult development at the University of Toronto. Among other things, she has written about the psychology of reading fiction.

She lists five ways in which we are transformed by it:

• Empathy – We learn to understand what other people are thinking or feeling.
• Social Skills – Fiction simulates the social world giving the reader more skill in that arena.
• Learning About Ourselves – Fiction gives us the opportunity to contrast our lives against the lives of others.
• Personality – This makes us more fluid in how we see ourselves.
• Cognitive Skills – “Cognitive closure” is a negative term meaning a person has made up their mind about something. Reading fiction helps to keep an open mind.

Keeping Dr. Djikic’s concepts in mind, I now return to the books.

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Talking about infertility – and Empathy…

Reading fiction about fertility issues is a great way to develop empathy for those suffering through it – and there are a lot of people who are. The CDC says that 13.4% of women ages 15-49 have impaired fecundity. It’s 16.3% if we talk about married women in that age group.

I am reminded of my divorce 30 some years ago. Ever after, when I read the simple statement that someone “got divorced,” I laugh to think that so few words can cover up so much pain and upheaval and stress and… Well, those who “experience infertility” must feel the same way.

How lucky am I to learn about fertility struggles fictionally rather than having a firsthand education?

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Talking about male/female issues – and Learning About Myself…

In both books, the main female character had a first relationship or marriage that went astray and then a marriage with Mr. Right.

In Anna Quindlen’s book, we have Polly and Mark. Mark is so completely Mr. Right that I had to wonder if the author was dealing in magic too. Theirs is the kind of relationship where Mark told Polly on the first or second date that he was going to marry her someday. I’m not very comfortable with an author holding out this example of love. I hope it exists, but it’s certainly in short supply.

In Rebecca Serle’s book, the couple, Lauren and Leo, have a major issue that needs resolution. Yep! I recognize that sort of love story.

So there I am, a cynic about true love. My own divorce certainly played a part in that. But then, here is what my dad taught me on the topic – marriage is a 50/50 proposition with each partner giving 60. That’s more of a negotiation than divine providence to me.

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Talking about parent/adult child relationships – more Learning About Myself…

Let’s look at Polly first. She has never gotten along with her mother but basks in the love she and her father share. Currently she is butting heads with her mom over her father’s care. He has dementia and is living in a facility. In Polly’s mind, she will always be his “Pumpkin Pie.” (Though his mind no longer remembers that lifelong term of endearment.)

Lauren on the other hand comes from a couple generations of mother/daughter strain. Lauren doesn’t always get along with her mom, Marcella, who doesn’t always get along with her own mother, Sylvia, though for much of their lives, they all live together in Sylvia’s house. Lauren and Marcella both fervently love their father/husband, Dave, who has significant heart issues and is not likely to survive surgical repair.

The universality of a woman not getting along with her mother is expressed by Polly’s therapist who said, “I’d like to disabuse you of the notion that you are the only woman in the world who doesn’t like her mother.”

I identify with this and rebel against it both. I struggled with my mom in her lifetime only to figure out how much I adore her a few years late. And beyond that, I am a mother of daughters and I just want to be loved.

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One more similarity between the books – and Cognitive Skills…

There was another element appearing in the books that I did not mention at the start – both moms had secrets to reveal that impacted the way their daughters saw them. I did not mention this because I think we all carry secrets even if they are not as large as the ones in these books.

Because of these secrets, we can never really know the other person. And so in dealing with a less than ideal relationship, I try to extend the benefit of the doubt. There just might be something that explains the odd behavior of the other person.  

Well, there you have it, no cognitive closure for me.

But blog closure? Yep! This is it.

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If you like my writing, I hope you will check out my new book, Chai on Life. It contains 36 slice-of-life stories ranging in topics from belly fat to Billy Joel. It is available wherever books are sold and on Amazon. There is even a companion journal for you to write the stories of your life.

Chai on Life is available in 3 formats: Hard Back, Kindle, and AudioBook.